Dear guy who rear-ended me;The first words out of your mouth should have been:
"Are you alright?" followed by,
"I'm so sorry, I'm a complete idiot, I'm so, SO sorry!"
not
"I don't think there is any damage, I barely bumped you."
You're damn lucky there wasn't any damage and you're also damn lucky I didn't have my baby girl in the van with me and you're super damn lucky that I just wanted to get the eff home after sitting in traffic for an hour. We were going 10km/hour - how did you manage to fail at stopping while we were practically sitting still?
Dear old guy in the rusted truck;
Thank you for recognizing my need to merge into your lane. Thank you for gesturing for me to come on over and acknowledging my wave of appreciation by waggling your own arthritic, knobby hand in return. People like you know how their actions make life just a little nicer for everyone.
Dear 19 year old skinny bitch in the purple Chevy Malibu;
It was awesome how you flashed your blinker for a whole 1/2 second before flying over into my lane and cutting me off so I had to slam on my breaks. You managed to make me cringe and peek into my rear view mirror in anticipation of another bump on the rear end. I was relieved to see there was nobody behind me.
I think you should have a sit down with the rusted truck guy and take notes.
Dear Mom;
I really am fine. The rear ender was nothing but a tap. Don't panic.
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10 comments:
Oh, that sucks! I hate commuting. I hate driving at all, actually. I was in an accident once - and not a fender bender - where the guys first words were, "Okay, that was your fault".
...it was, but that isn't the point. Glad you're okay. Unless you're lying to your mother, in which case, don't do that. *hugs*
I am also glad you are okay. This is why I still have my permit lying around and still have not mustered up the courage to learn to drive. Give me a crowded, New York City train anytime!
I hate drivers. I just wish I didn't have to drive among them.
so funny! thanks for this.
I just got rear-ended a couple of weeks ago, and went into a complete psycho-rage on the VERY apologetic guy who hit us (and I wasn't even driving, my girlfriend was!!). Felt totally bad afterward.
I'm tagging you!!! http://sexdiariesofamom.blogspot.com/2008/10/ive-been-tagged.html
I'm glad you are okay Heather! Take it easy...on the road that is ;0)
I hate that this happened, but it was so funny reading about it. You really are very creative. I hope you have a day without a stupid guy and skinny bitch and with more knobby handed old men. Hmmm... I don't that came out quite right but you know what I mean. LOL :D... time for a quiet bath, huh?
Keely - I wouldn't lie to my mother - unless I wanted to enter an early grave...she emailed me btw to see if it was 'really true or just a story'.
Nellie - Ugh, I just can't do public transit. Good on you for doing it though!
Charles - me too
Stacy - Hope you are ok!
The Mom - thanks for the tag!
Petula - LOL! Thanks for the giggle
We need a laser device that will laser key cars of idiot drivers. How handy that would be.
People assume the type of people who drive minivans. Don't people realize some of us don't drive them because it's a vehicle of choice, but one of necessity? Ooo I want my Jeep back!
Shannon
Vogue Mum
Rock Star Maternity
Domestic Engineer's Union
Boy do I have experience with getting rear-ended. Once I literally got rear ended on my way to the body shop after I hit a deer.
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