Hope you all had a fantastic Holiday Season!

Hello! As you may have noticed (or not) I took a bit of a bloggy break over the holidays. Not so much because of the holidays but more because my darling little H is still having separation anxiety issues - especially at bedtime, and this has left me with little time for, well, anything really.

I was up with her at 1:30 last night for an hour. Yawn.

I really hope she gets over this soon. It's SO draining! And I have lots of projects in mind that I'm dying to jump on...like knitting. I've decided I want to learn to knit well. You know, like with a pattern. I also have one project in progress that I really want to finish. I've started a rag quilt and I guesstimate that I'm about halfway finished. That quilt calls to me on a daily basis and I just haven't had the focus to pick it up.

Anyway, I just thought I'd pop in and see how you all are doing. Things will pick up soon here with new giveaways and new featured moms and the Monday's Muse meme of course. What have you all been up to?

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Monday's Muse - the Meme for Creative Moms

Read about the Meme.

This week I'm inspired by possibilities.

The possibility that little H's sleep issues will be overcome.
The possibility that little H's sleep issues will be overcome with minimal tears.
The possibility that little H's sleep issues will be overcome with minimal tears from my eyes.
The possibility that little H's sleep issues will be overcome in a short period of time.
The possibility that my nights sleeping on the hardwood floor outside her bedroom door are almost over.
The possibility that I can reclaim my evenings for myself.
The possibility that I can use those evening times towards creative things.
The possibility that I will indulge those creative thoughts and in doing so, will become a better mother, a better wife and a better version of myself.

What's inspiring you this week? Enter your url below to share




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A few things here, a few things there

#1) Unless you've been under a rock, you've heard of the Mom Bloggers Club. I've been a member for a while and have to say it is one of my favorite spots on the net. Well, I've been named one of the top 10 members to get to know! Wheeee! You guys already know me but do you know the other 9 on the list? Check them out, they are all great blogs and moms to know. Oh, and I'm also an ambassador for the MBC - if you aren't on my friend list just send me a request and if there's anything I can do for you over there just let me know and I'll do my best to help out. Ok, here are the other members.

1. A Cowboy's Wife (Lori)
2. Kristen Andrews
3. MaternalSpark
4. Jen
5. Annette Piper
6. Jennifer
7. Alyssa
8. Dannie
9. Kailani
10. Anne-Marie Nichols

#2) Little H is having some freaky deaky separation anxiety lately. Only at bedtime. So it's meant that I put her in her crib, then, lay outside her doorway in the hall "sleeping" so she can see me while she's falling asleep. Now you know why I haven't blogged much this week! It seems to be getting slightly better and I'm thankful that it hasn't bothered her when I drop her off at the sitters. I'm also thankful that once she falls asleep it seems to be business as usual for the rest of the night although, sometimes I've ended up camped in the hallway for quite some time.

#3) Look up there. WAY up there. There are a crapload of giveaways happening here right now! Some of them are open only to RSS email subscribers. Make sure you plug your email in that box to the right in order to qualify.

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Chicken or Egg?

Little H's night light went out awhile ago. We didn't have a replacement bulb. I started to worry. We keep her door closed so the cats don't get up to midnight shenanigans in there - it's REALLY dark once the door is closed.

Would she wake up in the middle of the night and freak out that it was so dark in there?

Would she be traumatized and scared of her room?

Would the entire household be awake for hours causing me to send hubby out in the darkness to search every gas station for bulbs?

Would I be forced to leave the door open and would the cats scratch her through the bars of her crib because her little piggies were a danglin' and that's just too damn much temptation for a cat now isn't it?

Then I realized I was crazy, put her in her crib, shut the door and she was off to sleepy land. It's been a week of darkness and she's just fine (yeah, I'll get a bulb eventually, who has time?). This whole view into my mental instability isn't just for shits and giggles folks - I do have a point here...or more of a question / observation combo:

Does creativity feed the maternal worry causing it to spiral out of control or does becoming a mom, start the worry that feeds the creativity? Which came first? Because, I know I've always been creative but I don't think I've always been crazy. On the other hand, maybe I was always crazy and am just now realizing it?

This post kinda proves that doesn't it. Nevermind! Nothing to see here ;)

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How far can I push it before my brain asplodes?

On Wednesdays I usually work from home via email. I decided to do this because:

a) I don't like being away from little H 40 hours a week
b) It saves us in childcare costs
c) Hubby only gets every second weekend off. So not every week, but every second week, he is off on Wednesdays - so every second Wednesday we get a bit of family time (did 'ja get that?).
d) I enjoy my pjs and
e) Time saved commuting is time I can, maybe if I'm lucky and all the planets align and I don't cook dinner, get some creative stuff done.

Right now at work we are dealing with three HUGE projects that involve a lot of money. I need to be there to help out and coordinate actions surrounding these projects. So guess what. Wednesday came around and I couldn't afford to not be in the office - there is just too much going on. What I'm doing about it? I'm taking little H to work with me.

Please pray for me that:

Little H doesn't cover me from head to toe in goo, snot, tears, banana or something else equally embarrassing.

That she doesn't have a massive poop blowout for all the world to smell

That she sits nicely in her stroller and watches her baby Einstein video during my meeting (yes, I will be in a teleconference meeting!)

That she amuses herself safely and allows me to actually get some stuff done.

My head hurts just thinking about it!

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Mercantile Spark, Daycare and Writing - Oh My!

Thought I'd do a little update type post today.

Mercantile Spark

The new blog is coming along very nicely! The design is looking great - I bit the bullet and paid a designer for this one as I am not familiar with Word Press as of yet and don't really have loads of time to figure it all out on my own. It's a nice, calm color pallet and the layout will work really well with the format I have in mind. So far, so good.

Daycare for Little H

As you know we found ourselves suddenly without a daycare provider last month. We've been scooting by on the skin of our teeth until now, having flown out one Grandparent and used a few holiday days. Good news is we found a new sitter! She has a little boy who is the perfect age to be a great playmate for Little H. I'm feeling really good about the new situation. She starts her first full day on Thursday so wish us luck.

Writing

I finished my piece for Chicken Soup for the Power Moms Soul. I have mixed feelings about it. On one hand, I wish I had loads more time to devote to tweaking and polishing and pouring over every detail. On the other hand, I don't have that time. The result is something that was produced in a very simple manner. I sat down and wrote the first half. Then, I wrote the second half in my next sitting. A few edits later and it is what it is. I hope they like it enough to put me on the shortlist but who knows. At this point in my life and with all that has been going on I'm proud that I even managed to write it. Even if it never gets published it will still remind me of this time where I'm clinging to my passions with all I have left. I hope you are doing the same.

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The Chaos, I hate it!

Things are up in the air. I have nothing that is certain at this point regarding childcare for my Little H. Everyone I've interviewed has been sub standard and in this city, daycare facilities have at least a one year wait list (some have a two year one, and some just hang up on you).

One woman I interviewed repeated over and over throughout our conversation that "She has nothing to hide". It freaked me out. Another decided to up her rate from $960 a month to $1060 after I told her what a hard time we were having. How loving of her. At this point, that amount of money is half my salary. It's making me wonder if I should get a part time job and care for her myself. It certainly doesn't make sense to me to work a full time job, get half the pay and have my baby cared for by some weirdo.

In light of all this, I managed to write a little last week. When I say, a little - I mean 300 words. But I'm still proud of myself for getting that done. It's a step towards a final outcome and I took the time to nurture creative thoughts and feelings in a time when I just want to put my head in the sand and pretend all is right with my world.

I hope the rest of you are working away on your projects - no matter what else is going on. It's good for you.


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Who needs a babysitter now? A toilet incident.

I’m back at work now, the transition has gone pretty well to this point. On Thursday Little H will go to a sitter (whom she adores) so who knows what will happen then. I’m hoping she has so much fun playing with her friends that she won’t notice I’ve been gone all day. Here’s to hoping.

As it turns out, Little H isn’t the one who needs a sitter anyway. It seems that hubby is the one who requires around the clock supervision. You see, he was mowing the yard yesterday (this isn’t a lawn mower accident story so you can resume breathing) and decided he needed to use the facility. So inside the house he goes, down stairs to our bathroom. He proceeds to do his duty (#1) and as he is flushing, his sunglasses jump from their perch on the collar of his shirt and plummet into the toilet bowl which is forcefully swirling water down, down, down. They vanished instantly and I can only imagine the look of incredibility on hubby’s face as this occurred. I picture wide open eyes, his mouth agape, and a vulgar word (#2).

He went to the hardware store and got a snake to see if he could fish them out and got nothing. I’m hoping that they went all the way through and aren’t lodged there. Time will tell, for now I’m considering hanging a sign above reading ‘please pee only – no #2’s allowed’.

*Sigh*

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Where have all the parents gone? (Off topic again, get over it)

Image via WikipediaYou know that scene in Harold and Kumar go to Whitecastle where Kumar is peeing on that bush? And he is alone in the woods until, suddenly, there is another guy who chooses to pee on the same bush...of all the bushes in the woods, he sidles right up to Kumar and lets fly. You know that scene? Well folks, that has become my life.

It seems that everywhere we go, some kid sidles up beside us. The parents are nowhere to be found (or in one case, she was there but not really there.)

Example #1 - I'm at this horrendous place called "Coffee and Scream" wherein the moms can have coffee and the kids can play in the play area. The moms seem to feel that they can dump their kids in the play area and then close their eyes while they drink coffee. It was sheer madness in there. Then, one woman puts her 5 month old (he was just learning to roll) on the ground next to where a friend and I were playing with our kids and takes off to the bathroom with her three year old. Not a word to us. No, hey can you watch my baby, or would you mind just for a sec, or I'll be right back. She Just Left. To another room, BEHIND A DOOR.

Example #2 - Hubby and I take little H to a swimming pool. The place is empty because it's a Thursday afternoon. There was us and a guy with his toddler. Out of nowhere this 10 year old girl swims up. She's nice and she just wants to play with little H but, um. Parents are required to swim with their kids. Kids aren't allowed to swim alone. Did the mom just tell her to swim with us so the lifeguards would think she was ours?? No matter where we went this poor little girl followed. I felt so sad for her.

Example #3 - It was a rare occasion where little H was happy in her stroller, eating cheerios and watching passers by. I decided that I needed a latte fix so we pop into Starbucks. I order and little H is still happy so I decide to grab a table and actually enjoy my drink from a seated position. A three year old terror in pigtails arrives at our table. She's grabbing little H's sippy cup. She's taunting her with keys (what three year old has free access to keys?) She's touching Little H's hands, face, hair. I'm looking at the mom with that, get your damn kid out of here look on my face. The mom sees me, but the barrista is calling her drink and she's fumbling with the lid and how on earth can she tear herself away from a coffee in order to deal with her kid?

What the hell is going on? If you're out in public, keep control of your kids. Keep them in sight. Keep them from assaulting other children. If your drink is ready, you get your lulu lemon'd ass over to your kid BEFORE you deal with your coffee. When little H is older you can bet your ass I wont expect other people to parent her just because she is within their general area.

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